Worst MOM Day Ever!

10 May

Hey, long time no see! I have been in the midst of a few transitions recently. I have a new job. A wonderful, exciting new job where I can work less hours, work from home, and be there for the kids after school. It is similar to what I have been doing, without the intensely painful stomach ulcers that I was developing. And did I mention less hours?!

We also got a bunny for Big A’s birthday. He is absolutely the cutest thing ever. His name is Nutmeg and he is a just over two-month old Mini-Rex (it is a short hair and better for the A’s allergies). Everyone seems to be getting along all right so we think we are clear in that area. I took him to the vet after we bought him from the pet store because I think that pet store vets are like optometrists. At least the one I went to. Seriously, get more schooling! They were over prescribing me for years! My eyes weren’t as bad as they said. But I digress.. So I took Nutmeg to the real vet (opthamologist ;)) and coincidentally one that worked for the Society of House Rabbits at one point. She said Nutmeg has conjunctivitis. So I have been putting eyedrops in his eyes twice a day. I got a stye in my eye the same week before we bought him. Hubby says I gave him conjunctivitis. Still not sure if that is possible. Hubby is mean.

Anyways, Nutty likes to be out of his cage. LOVES IT! He practically lifts up his little paws for me to take him out. And when he runs around the living room, he does these little twist hops. It is so freaking cute. We can tell that he is happy to be with us. And boy am I wrapped around one of those little paws already. I am glad we found him. At first I called rabbit shelters. I was trying to do the humane thing and get one from there, maybe even the gorgeous one I saw online one with one ear named Uno. Some of those poor bunnies were in bad shape and need of a good family! But none of them called me back and they weren’t open when they said they would be so I gave up. We are not going to turn around and abandon Nutmeg anyways. We will be good pet owners 🙂

So back to the worst Mom day ever. It wasn’t Mother’s Day. That was very nice. Hubby got me a bunch of gift cards to cover anything I could possibly want, got bagels for breakfast and made chocolate chip banana bread! Then I spent the afternoon with my mom, sister and niece and we saw The Back Up Plan and had ice cream afterwards. Cute movie!

No, I mean TODAY was a day when I actually thought, I HATE being a mom. In the movie yesterday there was a part where her friend had a bunch of kids and her house, her clothes and her hair was a mess, and the kids were running around screaming. And she is trying to clean a chicken for dinner and she left the room for a second and then suddenly this horde of kids runs by and they have her chicken and they are playing with it. She yells at them uselessly and then just stops and says, “I hate them!” That was me today. Even though I really love them to death! For some moms, it might be just another one of their days – a typical day. I guess I am lucky and these kinds of days are few and far between. I got to hand it to those moms that have more than two kids. Those moms are amazing. I also think they are crazy. One foot in the door of the looney bin. No offense, moms. Just sayin’.

So my new boss -I LOVE her -decided to implement summer hours. She and I will both get one day off a week until after the fall. She is amazing! This will help a ton when Big A is home for the summer. So today was my first day off. Although I shortened it to just a half day this week. I was looking forward to a morning of quiet happiness. Sleeping in, a little work out, throw in some laundry (ok, A LOT of laundry) a shower and a nice lunch and then I would settle down to work. Fabulous! But NO! Little A decided he didn’t feel well. He even had a small fever and said his head hurt. I felt bad for him, but was also a little irritated. This was MY morning. So Hubs went to work and I saw Big A off to the bus. Little A watched some cartoons while I tried to do some of that sleeping in. Hard when he came in every five minutes wanting something.  Then I decided to get up and work out. I booted him out of the living room and into his room. The work out felt good! Then a shower then lunch – I put him down for a nap and started working. I adjusted. It’s what moms do.

Around 3:30, he woke up and I gave him some more medicine, grape medicine (Grape = purple) for his fever and headache and a little piece of chocolate (chocolate = brown) since he was such a good boy. Then I had just sat down in the office again when I heard frantic crying. I ran in the living room as he is running to the kitchen. “Do you have to throw up?” He’s nodding and whining and twirling for some damn reason! Not knowing where to go first, I guess. So then he runs toward me, towards the bathroom and then it was too late. The carpet gets it first and then he comes closer and my feet (bare feet) and my jeans get it next. Then more of the carpet and some of the bathroom tile and rug. Then some wall and some door. Thank God Nutmeg wasn’t running around at the time. Which would have A) added to the mess and B) given us a chocolate covered fur ball. Can you imagine the horror of little chocolate bunny foot prints all over the room?! OMG. Thank goodness for small miracles. He makes enough of his own mess with his little marbles he leaves in the corners of the room. My boss calls it being like a pez dispenser so that is what Hubby has been calling it now – pezzing. Back to the mess…I stood there, covered in chocolate. IT WAS JUST A LITTLE PIECE!! WTF?! I stared down at the mess and wished it away on its own. Little A was groaning with a big chocolate drool dangling down to the floor. Chocolate drool oozed between my toes. I wanted to cry. I ushered him to the toilet and told him to finish and then ran to get paper towels. Cleaning it up, I realized that my soiled jeans were adding to the mess so I stripped them off and finished cleaning in my underwear. In the midst of it all, Big A had come home from school. He threw his backpack down and headed for the kitchen. A little while later, while I am up to my knees and elbows in chocolate and grape mess, and oh, is that some hot dog from lunch? Fabulous. Now little chunks were added to the equation and my nose is running. Why does your nose run after looking down for so long? And after awhile I finally hear what Big A has been saying over and over again for the past five minutes. “Mom, I’m hungry!” I stop, pretty angry, and say, “Son, do I look like I am available to make you a delicious snack right now?!” I think I might have screamed it. Possibly. He leaves, irked at me, to find his own snack.

Awhile later, after putting some chocolate covered laundry in the washer, I heard the door buzzing and the kids letting in some man from the census bureau! Thankfully I had already gotten some pants on by this point. Turns out the neighbor didn’t fill out her form – NOT ME! Note to self: have ANOTHER talk to boys about just buzzing anyone in to the building.

As I sit down to work again, I hear “Uh oh…..awwwwwww, you spilled!” I closed my eyes. I take a deep breath. I go in the kitchen to find both of them wearing their Spiderman Halloween costumes in the midst of spilled apple juice. Fabulous. WTF? Then comes the hysterical laughter. I guess it doesn’t have to be more than two kids!

Then hubby calls, ten minutes until eight pm as I write this who said he was leaving at 5:30 to come home and HELP ME! “I am surprised you haven’t called me.” He says. “I HAVE HAD MY HANDS A LITTLE FULL TODAY!” “I’m on my way home.” “FABULOUS.”

And now as I write this, AN ADDED BONUS! Crash! “WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW?!?!?!?!” “Cleaning” is the answer. “CLEANING WHAT?!” For some reason I can’t get my voice to come down to a normal level. And I am twitching. “Cleaning the meroe!” “THE MIRROR? WITH WHAT?!” “Soap. See…all clean!” “GAH!!”

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4 Responses to “Worst MOM Day Ever!”

  1. Michele May 10, 2010 at 9:05 pm #

    LMAO… I am sorry I am laughing all over again. I still love the Calgon commercial idea, I think I need to send them this new script from this afternoon!

    I hope he is feeling better now and you are now relaxing and not stressing!

    I had three boys and I don’t think even I had this much mom drama in one day!

  2. kweenmama May 17, 2010 at 10:03 pm #

    Wow. That was quite a mom day. Thankfully it’s not like that all the time…right??!?

    At least you’ve chronicled it here on your blog. You will all be able to laugh about it one day. 🙂

  3. Patrice June 3, 2010 at 8:54 am #

    hey hey hey. It’s been awhile since I’ve talked to you. How have you been? I hope all is good with you and the boys. 🙂

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Some days you just shouldn’t get out of bed « - June 10, 2011

    […] that I told her to write it down and I was going to put it in my blog. It reminded me somewhat of the day I had when Little A was sick. Some days you just shouldn’t get out of […]

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