Random Tuesday Thoughts: Do you think I am talking to hear my own voice?!

randomtuesday

Today’s Random Tuesday Thoughts are brought to you by Friends of Friends who go to Arby’s: You might as well just throw it right into the toilet! And also, Wives United Against Computer Gaming: We hope your online gamer geeks keep you warm at night!

And let us begin! (Hubster, you might want to just skip today’s post all together. I am not having good Tuesday thoughts. Just so you know, you have been warned.)

*Please tell me what to do to make boys (big and little), pee inside the toilet and not all over it? And how does it get around the bolts at the bottom base of the toilet? It is not dripping down the sides (thank goodness) – so how does it get down there?! Which brings me to:

*Can you freaking wipe out the sink after you brush your teeth? Or after you come your hair? I know I have Superman eyes now that I just got Lasik, but seriously, can you not see?! Do you not see the gobs of blue and white all over? Is it so hard to rinse off your toothbrush when you are done so all of your goup/spittle does not congregate underneath the head? You know that little bend in the neck part before the handle? DEE-scusting! And, if you didn’t have so much hair, I would seriously be worried that you are going bald because it is all over the sink! Seriously! Wipe it off!

*Hello?! Are you even listening to me? Look at me, when I am talking to you! Do you think SpongeBob is going to make you something to eat? I swear I am going to take a bat to that computer monitor! Or pry the back off of the computer – I am sure you don’t need all those pretty wires!

*This is to all those clothing fashion designers out there. Not all women are 5’9″! Can you make some stuff in different lengths?! God bless those that do, but most of the stuff out there only comes in one length – too long! I bought the cutest jumpsuit that I have to get hemmed because the legs are twice as long as my own! Come on! We are not Amazons.

*Which brings me to high heels. Who the hell invented those? I would like to meet them and punch them in the bunions. Thanks. A. Lot. “Hey, let’s make women walk on sticks. Sure, they will have feet, joint and back problems all their lives, but damn, do their legs look sexy! And while we are at it, let’s charge them an arm and a leg for really pretty ones and only make them in sizes that Barbie can wear and be comfortable in.”

Is that enough? Can I be any more crabby? I have been holding in these random thoughts for a bit and I just had to get them out. Sorry, honey. I hope you are not even reading this.

For more RTT and hopefully less bitchiness, visit Keely at The Un-Mom!

9 thoughts on “Random Tuesday Thoughts: Do you think I am talking to hear my own voice?!

  1. You make them sit down EVERY SINGLE TIME. It works.

    And my back still hurts today from wearing high heels on Sunday. Ugh.

    The long pants are payback from all the years I had to wear floods because women’s pants were NEVER long enough.

  2. MY online gamer geek keeps me warm at night. And HIS keeps HIM warm at night.

    (That would be me. I just re-read that and realized it’s really effing confusing).

    Mind you I occasionally step away from the computer to clean the toilet, too.

  3. Hey, just read your post. Wow, I didn’t realize you were having such a bad evening. Or were you just being funny? Peyton is just beginning to pee standing up and I’m not looking forward to cleaning up the messes. Maybe Keith can train him!

    Anyway, I hope the rest of your evening turned out better than the beginning. (I’m thinking that if Will read your post he probably took the hint)

    See you in the morning my lovely!

    Sara

  4. AMEN. It’s even worse when you’re 5’1 (like me). All of my pants drag on the floor unless I wear heels because I’m too lazy to drop them off to get hemmed.
    PS I haven’t gotten it yet but the mail is SLOW. Sometimes I think they just take a few days off and come into work when they feel like it. Ugh. I can’t WAIT to read it!

  5. OMG I can soooo relate with the pee!!! How does it get to the crease between the toilet base and the tile, they must be able to bend the stream around the bowl. Now that’s talent!!!

    The hair in the sink! Don’t get me started! My hubby leaves the hairs all over, it drives me nuts!

    Clothes and bras are hideous if you’re over a certain size and I too wish I could find a cute pair of flats or sandals that weren’t 4 inches in the air. How about a cute one and a half or two inch heel and can you make them in a size 12. Mmm thanks!

    I sooooo feel your pain!!! Great Post!

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